Self Care: 5 Powerful Habits

Self care; it’s the latest buzz word around town, the cat’s meow of wellness. And while trendy is not usually our lingo, this is one trend we can get behind! Check out five of our self care rituals that have simplified and improved our life; seriously, without these we’d still feel overwhelmed, anxious and just plain UGH. We hope you’re inspired by this post to never feel selfish for taking care of YOU.

1. Set Boundaries
Ever heard the phrase “you teach people how to treat you”? It’s one of our go-to mantras for eliminating chaos in relationships and within ourselves. Do you find yourself being available to people 100% of the time? Checking your phone compulsively throughout the day, worried you’re missing out on an important message, post, email? Do you roll over immediately upon waking and check your phone?

It’s no secret most people are addicted to being constantly available and in-the-know. It’s the way our world is wired and it’s so culturally acceptable that very few think to question this way of life. But the advantages of being constantly connected can start to chip away at mental clarity. People start to get anxious when you take too long to respond, or you feel guilty. Basically, you reach a point where you’ve taught people that they will receive a response from you almost immediately.

Just recently we developed a new email system after years of a chaotic inbox and checking messages ALL THE TIME. This method can be used for a variety of different activities – the end goal is to “schedule” phone time, versus mindlessly swiping every five minutes in search of a dopamine rush. At first it will seem a little wonky and you might feel “bad” for developing boundaries, but these are so necessary for your continued thriving!

-Email gets checked only three times per day. An auto responder to this effect is always on so people know what to expect. This eliminates the constant worry of “missing” something important or feeling like the weekend has to be spent worrying.
-No phone at least 30 minutes before bed. This means you may not be able to respond to that late night text message until tomorrow morning, or that phone call … and that’s okay!
-Random apps including social media also get checked 2-3 times per day. Admittedly, this one is still a struggle, but we are getting there one less swipe at a time.

Over time, people will come to understand and even appreciate your boundaries. They will recognize that you have to take care of YOU in order to take care of others. They will probably be inspired to create similar habits!

In case you’re wondering, this is how we delegate our inbox, which is always kept at ZERO. All messages go to our inbox and get sorted into these folders:

ACTION NEEDED:
Something needs to be done in order for this email to be completed – an action step, looking up information, etc. Once this is completed, the email gets categorized elsewhere (we have several labels within Gmail for completed emails and tasks, as an archive).

WAITING ON SOMEONE ELSE:
Waiting for a response before proceeding.

READ THEN ARCHIVE:
Promotional emails, articles etc to read when there’s downtime and then print or store somewhere (Evernote, for example) if we find value.

2. Say “No” Without Explaining Yourself
Ever get invited to something, decline and then spend the next ten minutes explaining yourself? Why oh why!? So many people have this tendency to need to over explain why they can or can’t do something. You are in no way responsible for detailing your entire life because a certain event doesn’t work for your schedule. This just causes more distress as you try to ‘read’ the other person’s face, wondering if they are taking offense or if they think your excuse is worthy. Truth is, it really doesn’t matter. You’ve got a life with obligations and priorities, and there will be things you simply can’t do/attend. Learning to say no without explaining yourself is a powerful lesson in self preservation.

3. Write A Weekly Top 5 List
Each week, make a list of the top five things you want to accomplish. Typically these are things that have been stressing you because you have been procrastinating (something we are all guilty of). Completing these tasks means you move forward and no longer have to think in terms of “if” they get done, but rather “when”. This doesn’t mean you have to stop at five! It simply means that you focus on these exclusively before moving on to other tasks. Some examples include:

-Scheduling important appointments (doctor, dentist, vet etc.)
-Returning a phone call from a loved one.
-Making sure bills are paid/scheduled.
-Meal prepping on Sunday.
-Anything else you’ve been moving from day-to-day without getting traction.

We are big fans of the Get Things Done (GTD) system and also utilize an app called Asana for our to-do lists and projects. The overwhelm and anxiety many people face daily is because our brain can only process so much in one day. Once we reach capacity, all the random thoughts and to-do items that pop in our head, without a place to put them, encourage a sense of panic. Our minds are worried we will forget, and we use up our daily “RAM” just contemplating how we will NOT forget various daily tasks, versus coming up with a game plan to actually get them done. Silly, right?

Once you have a system in place, make it a point to follow it and create a process for recording these random thoughts. Then, you can organize them and transfer them weekly onto your “Top 5” list.

Side-note: don’t stress if some weeks are less than stellar in the planning department … knowing you have a system that’s consistent and organized to come back to, your baseline, will be relief in moments of disarray.

4. Create Daily Rituals
This is one of our favorites! These have become a staple in our household. Not only do they promote a more peaceful environment, but they establish a baseline we can always return to:

-10 to 20 minutes of yoga
-5 to 20 minutes of meditation
-Exercise
-Morning green smoothie
-Gratitude journal
-Not checking phones until we’ve completed our morning rituals
-Checking email only three times per day (new habit!)
-Clothes laid out for the next few days or week
-Food and supplements prepared in advance to grab and go
-Phones go away at least 30 minutes before bed

We challenge you to make a list of daily rituals you want to cultivate in your life. Check things off as you go. Before you know it, days you don’t complete them will feel a little ‘off’. And thankfully, you’ll know how to get right back on!

5. Make Mindful Choices
Our fifth and final habit is all about being intentional in your life. Every decision you make does one of three things:

1.Moves you forward.
2.Pushes you back.
3.Keeps you in the same place.

None of these are inherently bad realities, but ideally you’re practicing a lot more of #1 with small daily steps. Thinking clearly about each choice: why it makes sense for you right now and how it will contribute to your life can help you escape self limiting beliefs. Don’t live on autopilot; consciously create the life and the environment that best aligns with your goals. Ways to practice this include:

-Think about each meal; whether it will nourish or harm, satiate or make you crave even more. Make your decision and own it. Sometimes it’s worth it … sometimes it’s not.
-Move your body and be thankful for the gift of movement.
-Live an action based life. Don’t just think it, imagine what it will be like to achieve it, and then set out to do it!
-Live in the present moment – don’t fret over what’s already happened and don’t try to anticipate what hasn’t happened yet (and may not ever happen). Just live now. Enjoy now. When you feel that past or future thought process creeping on, focus your attention on what’s going on in front of you in that very moment and choose not to engage with those thoughts. Whether something does or doesn’t happen that you anticipated, the energy output is the same. Why not save that energy instead, especially considering there’s a chance you’re worrying about something that won’t happen or probably won’t be as bad as you imagine?
-Never fear failure. Sometimes failure happens. It becomes that option we said wasn’t an option. Then we get on the Self Judgment Hamster Wheel and let the failure continue. Stop it! Be okay with making mistakes and learn from them. Don’t beat yourself up and obsess; dust yourself off and keep going. Being resilient means being human and being vulnerable, resisting perfection, which then leads to MAJOR growth!

What’s one self care related habit you practice daily? Share with us in the comments!

Until Next Time,

Sham & Christina
Inspired Wellness

About Inspired Wellness

We are a wellness movement aimed at cultivating greatness in all areas of life. We believe that everything is connected and that having the body of your dreams shouldn’t come at the price of your mental and emotional health. You can catch us locally in sunny Sacramento CA inspiring lives at our wellness center with fitness, nutrition and lifestyle programs, or online doing the same thing with our new online training site + community coming soon!

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