Let’s Conquer Fear

We’re 100% certain you’re feeling it, feel it or have felt it in the past. You see, FEAR is a type of STRESS that is very toxic to your ability to enjoy life. Think about it – when you’re stressed, what is the reason behind it? Often times you are:

• Trying to anticipate the future and getting overwhelmed, worried and less productive as you try to wade through the muddy waters of a stressful mindset.

There are two types of fear: rational and irrational. Rational? It keeps you alive, prepares you for defending yourself against danger. Irrational fear, on the other hand, does the very opposite … it keeps you from LIVING. The crazy part is, both of these feel the same in your body.

Irrational fear, aka STRESS, wedges itself deep within your psyche and can make your head spin. It’s all the what-if and why-not scenarios that play a loop in your mind. That deadline you might not make, that person you’re not too fond of at work that you’ll inevitably have to see today, that goal you set that feels like an insurmountable mountain. It’s all the internal dialogue telling you that you can’t possibly achieve your goals with this thing called LIFE getting in the way.

Thing is, (and this is big), FEAR [stress] does NOT exist in the present moment. YUP. Repeat after us: FEAR does NOT exist in the present moment. It is a chaotic projection of a painful future. It is impossible for it exists in the HERE and now because its main component is to WORRY in advance, and then all those lovely fight or flight feelings take hold.

On the flip side, fear is something that gets smaller and less significant the closer you get to it. You have to embrace it and listen to what it’s trying to tell you. Are you stuck in a negative loop? If so, the first step is awareness so you can take action. Check out our top 5 tips for conquering fear/stress:

Tip #1: Realize that fear is the only thing that gets smaller and less significant the more you approach it. You need to embrace fear.

When you run from fear and try to avoid it, things get messy. You start to feel lost and harbor a bunch of pent up energy. You start to resent things that used to make you happy, because you can longer experience them the same way in your current state. In order to tackle fear (aka STRESS) head-on, you need to approach it with the confidence that you WILL overcome it. The first step is understanding WHY. Sometimes it’s as simple as getting more organized so your thoughts can breathe. Or maybe it’s finally signing up for that race that you know is challenging, but will ultimately lead to great things in your life; improved confidence, a certified stamp of badass-ness and the reminder that yes, you just did that … and yes, you are capable of oh-so-much more. The great part is you’ll be eradicating the STRESS of knowing you SHOULD do something but just haven’t taken the leap. Embrace your fear. Hold its hand. Walk with it and watch it get less and less intimidating.

Tip #2: Adopt a “One Degree” Mindset

What is this mindset we speak of? Picture this: you’re pushing through and feeling like a rock star with your workout. You’re pounding out those last few mountain climbers when suddenly your mind goes “I CAN’T DO THIS!!!!”. To which your body goes “You know what, you’re right.” It is in this moment that you have a choice: give up, or push through those last few seconds and realize the breakthrough that’s available in your body. Pushing just that last extra bit, that “one degree”, is where the magic happens. Where you realize your capability and set a new benchmark for performance. It’s right at that peak where the smallest push forward leads to enormous breakthroughs. But you have to conquer that fear-based mindset, that STRESS that creeps in and tells you that you’re not capable.

Tip #3: Now translate the above into every other aspect of your life.

In every area of life, find a way to dig deeper and push through that fake limitation your mind is creating. Translate this into your relationships, business, everything. For example, how often do you approach fear in conversations with your loved ones, kids, spouse? You feel that resistance and push away instead of forging ahead and creating new, healthy patterns and relationships. Or maybe in your business or job you often feel stressed to the max, FEARful of what’s to come, and in turn push opportunities for growth away. Instead you wallow in the land of maybe, someday … if such and such situation or person improves. But the person who will have the biggest impact on your success is, you guessed it, YOU. Have that tough conversation. Embrace that new challenge and take some risk. You never know what breakthroughs lie ahead!

Tip #4: Remember that afterward when you’ve gotten through it you will realize it wasn’t so hard.

How many things can you truly so were SO incredibly hard, that you would never do them again? Chances are, very few if any. This is because those situations helped propel you forward by inspiring GROWTH. Be it physical or mental, this growth then helped shape the trajectory of your life and provided an opportunity to learn and become a better version of yourself. Most things we fear and that then lead to worry and stress, are actually not as scary once we’ve conquered them. An example that comes to mind is zip lining in Hawaii. It was our honeymoon and 600+ feet up in the air. Christina was absolutely terrified to try it. But, she decided to give it a go and once she did, she never wanted it to end! It was exhilarating, life affirming and a priceless memory we will forever cherish. She conquered that fear and experienced something she would have regretted not doing. What are you afraid to do that you know will help you grow and have a positive impact on your life?

Tip #5: Learn to recognize self sabotage.

Recognize when you are getting in your own damn way. What excuses are you brewing in your mind? What experiences are you blowing off in favor of sticking to the same old routine (which hasn’t worked for years)? Stop feeling comfortable in the throes of fear and stress – recognize the subconscious harm they do to your psyche and the way they stunt your growth. Take that risk, do that thing you don’t particularly want to do. Then watch yourself evolve in ways you could have only imagined.

Never forget that the best things in life happen on the other side of fear. If you wait for fear to go away you’re going to wait your entire life. It doesn’t go away until you actually make the leap.

Ways to get around fear:

1) Set a public declaration of when you will make that transition.

2) Look for someone who has the results you want and can get you the results you want (collapse time).

3) Confidence is a result not a requirement. The only way to gain confidence is to have the courage to take a leap of faith. Competence breeds confidence.

4) Recognize that when your back is against the wall you WILL find a way, so why not do it proactively?

Sincerely,